I'll Live For You
by ThominhoNalbyfan29
Summary: Brutus can't sleep the night before the battle of Philippi, so he goes to find Cassius, and they discover that their love for the other is not unrequited. Brutus/Cassius, implied past Portia/Brutus, past one-sided Titinius/Cassius and past Casca/Cassius and past Brutus/Caesar. Not a oneshot.
1. Chapter 1

Brutus pulled the sheets off him, but it didnt help the fact that he was still drenched in sweat. He checked on Lucius; the boy was still asleep, and he left his tent in his nightgown and went over to Cassius' tent. He went in expecting his brother in law to be asleep-it was late, but Cassius was sitting at his desk reading.

"Couldn't sleep either?" Brutus asked, going over to his friend. Cassius smiled as Brutus pulled up a chair and sat down next to him.

"Of course not," Cassius answered. He smiled, almost a mischievous one. "You were planning on waking me?" Brutus opened his mouth to reply but found himself unable, instead he blushed. Cassius grinned. "I love seeing you blush."

"You sly man," said Brutus, "you plotted that. At this rate we may just win tomorrow."

Cassius smirked. "Well, I doubt Octavius and Antony are as clueless as my Brutus," he declared, earning himself a smack on the head with his own book.

"What mean you by that?" asked Brutus. "I am not clueless."

"Yes, you are." Cassius declared.

"Not I."

"Yes."

The two men grinned, and then their smiles vanished. "Tomorrow," said Cassius, "it is possible, and probable, that both of us will not survive."

"Don't-" Brutus began, but Cassius held up a hand to stop him.

"Hear me out, brother." Cassius looked at him sadly. "Also, I need you to promise me you won't interrupt me no matter what you hear." Brutus nodded, and Cassius continued. "If we are separated tomorrow, I want you to know that I love you. You are the light of my life, you have been there for me and helped me when I needed you. When Titinius refused my love and Casca left me, you were there for me both times. It's stupid, I'm aware, and I hate myself every day for it. But I don't want you to die not knowing how I truly feel for you."

Brutus blinked tears out of his eyes. "Cassius," he breathed, eyes wide.

"You are beautiful," Cassius admitted. "I want you."

Brutus stood, and Cassius' heart gave a leap. "I can't do this."

"Why not?" Cassius swallowed the lump in his throat.

"Everyone I love tends to die," Brutus informed him. "Caesar, Portia...I won't let you die. I can't."

Then Cassius understood. "Oh, Brutus," he sighed, and he stood and went over to Brutus. "Portia's death was not your fault, and neither was Caesar's. I will spend the rest of my life convincing you otherwise if I must."

"I killed Caesar," Brutus sniffled, "and then I killed him again. I killed him twice. He looked me in the eyes as he died and he told me he loved me. He looked me in the eyes as we made love the night before and told me he loved me, and I killed him."

Cassius shook his head and wiped his eyes. "It was my fault," he admitted. "I convinced you to go against him, from the start it was me."

"Portia died because of my absence," Brutus pointed out.

"No." Cassius took one of Brutus' hands and held it in both of his. "You will not blame yourself, Brutus. I want you, and I will live for you." Brutus' eyes were turned to the ground, trying to hide the hunger in them. "You want me, too."

"You can't prove that," said Brutus.

"I heard you moaning last night. The whole camp probably heard you." Cassius lifted Brutus' chin. "You hunger for me now, Brutus."

"I can't give in," Brutus declared.

"Yes," Cassius pleaded. "You must, brother. Please." With that, he pressed his lips to the sensitive skin of Brutus' neck.

Whatever little control Brutus had then vanished in that instant; he grabbed Cassius and smashed their lips together. Cassius smiled triumphantly and wrapped his arms around Brutus, knocking his dresser over as they made their way to his bed kissing hungrily; fortunately, there was no taper burning on the dresser. Brutus threw Cassius down onto the bed and climbed on top of him, tugging impatiently on Cassius' lower lip with his teeth. Cassius opened his mouth and Brutus' tongue explored it as Cassius moaned.

"Please," Cassius begged him. When Brutus stroked him he cried, "Oh, Brutus!"

"Shh," Brutus kissed his lips softly. "We will wake everyone else."

"To hell with everyone else," Cassius growled, sitting up and kissing Brutus, his arms around Brutus' waist. Brutus chuckled and deepened the kiss, and Cassius' heart gave a leap. "Oh," he sighed, deepening their kiss even more. He felt Brutus smile against his lips. "Oh, gods..." After a long time, Brutus ended the kiss and reached for the fabric of Cassius' toga.

Afterwards, when they were snuggled together in bed, Cassius laughed and said, "I had no idea you could be such an animal in bed."

"Well, you were right," said Brutus.

"About what?"

"I want you." Brutus kissed Cassius deeply, and Cassius closed his eyes as a thrill of pleasure went through him. "I love you so much, Caius Cassius, and if we win this battle, will you marry me?"

Cassius' jaw dropped. After he snapped out of his shock he said, "I would be honored to wed you," he accepted, voice broken. _Here comes the tears again_, he thought with a sigh. Why couldn't he just hold himself together for one emotional moment?

Brutus wiped Cassius' eyes gently. "We will marry," he said, "and we will rule Rome together, as husbands."

Cassius smiled and kissed his lover. That sounded like an excellent plan.


	2. Chapter 2

"Brutus." Brutus could tell that his lover was trying not to cry. They embraced in front of everyone around them but they didn't care. They could very well not see each other again. "I love you so much, most noble brother."

"I love you as well," Brutus said. "This is not goodbye, my Cassius. We will meet again."

"If we win." Cassius pulled back, his eyes red and face wet with tears. "If we do not, forever and forever farewell, Brutus. If we do meet again, why, we shall smile. If not, then this parting was well made."

"Forever and forever farewell, Cassius," Brutus said, voice cracking. "If we do meet again, we'll smile indeed. If not, it's true this parting was well made." Brutus would not cry, he wouldn't, he wouldn't-

It came as a shock to him, the kiss. At first it was like Cassius was kissing a statue, and when Brutus began to respond he moaned and wrapped his arms around Cassius' neck. Everyone had fallen silent by this point and all eyes were on them, but neither cared. Cassius slipped his tongue in Brutus' mouth, which shocked Brutus even more because Cassius was so willing, so daring. Not that he ever hadn't been, but Cassius had never been too happy about his sexuality even when he accepted it. That being said, it stunned Brutus that Cassius wanted to kiss him in front of their friends.

When Cassius finally ended the kiss, most of their friends burst into applause. Brutus saw Titinius smiling, and he looked up at his lover, who was looking at Titinius as well. "Well," Messala said, "Brutus and Cassius! Hadn't seen that coming."

Brutus and Cassius both chuckled, and they kissed again briefly. "Should we tell them?" Cassius asked.

Brutus nodded. "Yes," he agreed. "Most noble friends, lend us your ears," he said, raising his voice to get everyone's attention. "If we win this battle and Cassius and I are still alive, we are to be married when we return to Rome."

Their friends smiled and congratulated them, and Cassius gave Brutus one last kiss before mounting his horse. Brutus did the same. "I love you," Cassius told him.

"I love you," Brutus said. "More than my own life."

Cassius smiled. "I feel the same for you, my Brutus," he declared. With that, he rode off in front of Brutus.

Cassius' POV:

"Oh, look, Titinius, look!" said Cassius during the battle. "Those villians, our soldiers, flee! I've become an enemy to my own soldiers! This standard-bearer here of mine was running away, so I killed him and took the flag from him." He pointed to the flag that he had taken.

"Oh, Cassius," his best friend said, "Brutus gave the orders too soon. Having an advantage over Octavius, he took it too eagerly, and his soldiers began looting, and now we're surrounded by Antony's men."

"Retreat farther, my lord," Pindarus suggested.

"I must not," Cassius gasped, leaning against a rock. "Titinius, if you love me at all, go see if those troops are friend or enemy."

Titinius nodded, an odd look on his face. "Cassius, if those troops are the enemy, and if they shall take me, I want you to know that I love you. I think I was just scared when you told me, and I didn't know what to make of it. But I am happy for you and Brutus."

"A bit late for that, is it?" Pindarus cut in.

Cassius sent him a glare. "I love you as well, Titinius," he said, voice breaking. Titinius stepped forward, reached up to hold Cassius' face, and kissed him on the lips. Cassius gasped and his eyes fluttered closed; his arms slid down to Titinius' waist as they kissed. Stunned, Cassius could do no more than watch as Titinius mounted his horse and rode off.

Pindarus also looked quite shocked. "That was...unexpected," he stammered.

Cassius glanced over at his servant, who he had forgotten was there. "Indeed, Pindarus." He was still trying to catch his breath. Titinius' lips on his had felt amazing, different than when Brutus kissed him, but amazing still.

"What are you going to tell Brutus?" Pindarus asked.

"That Titinius kissed me," Cassius informed him. "He knows of my feelings. He comforted me when Titinius rejected me."

"But he kissed you now."

"Yes."

"Was it good?"

Cassius grinned, even though Pindarus was his servant and shouldn't even be asking those questions, but even so Cassius replied, "Very good. Pindarus, go check on Titinius from that hill and tell me what happens."

"Yes, my lord," Pindarus said. "Oh, my lord!"

Cassius' stomach dropped. "What news?"

"Titinius is surrounded by horsemen who are quickly approaching him, yet he spurs onward. Now they're almost on him. Now, Titinius! Now some dismount. Oh, he gets down too." Pindarus turned to face Cassius, his expression sympathetic. "He's taken."


	3. Chapter 3

"My lord," said Pindarus. "I am truly sorry."

Only a moment ago, it seemed, Titinius' lips had been on his, and now he had been taken by the enemy? "Oh, I'm such a coward for living long enough to see my best friend taken before my eyes!" Cassius' eyes filled with tears.

"Brutus would not think it so," Pindarus countered.

"Brutus is not here," Cassius said. "Come here, boy. I took you prisoner in Parthia, and at the time I made you swear to try to do whatever I ordered you to, except to take your own life. Come now, keep your oath." With trembling hands, Cassius gave his sword to Pindarus. "Now you'll be a free man. Take this good sword, which ran through Caesar's bowels, and plunge it in my chest."

"No!" Just as Pindarus was about to obey, Cassius caught sight of Brutus running full speed towards him. Brutus threw his arms around Cassius' neck, gasping for breath, and almost knocking Cassius over.

"Brutus," Cassius said in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"I want to stay here, and protect you," Brutus insisted. "I will be your husband in short time. My Cassius, what cause do you have to kill yourself? Is my love for you not enough?"

"Of course your love is enough," Cassius said. "All I have ever wanted is Brutus' love."

"And not Titinius'?"

"I will not deny that I love Titinius," Cassius agreed, "for when he did leave to bring me word, he kissed me."

Brutus nodded. "I understand, my love. Please let me stay with you. I could not bear to see you dead."

"Very well," Cassius sighed. "You may stay."

Brutus smiled and kissed him, and Cassius put all that he had into their kiss. Cassius' servant turned away, likely embarrassed, as Cassius felt Brutus' tongue twisting around his own. When Titinius returned with word that the troops were their friends, he stopped mid-sentence when he saw Brutus and Cassius kissing, and he smiled.

"I love you," Brutus gasped when they had to pull back for air.

"I love you, my Brutus," Cassius agreed, pressing his lips to Brutus' again. "Let us retreat farther, and I will live for you."


	4. Chapter 4

As the four of them (Brutus, Cassius, Titinius, and Pindarus) walked through the Philippi fields, Cassius and Brutus talked, mostly about their wedding. "It will be in Rome," Brutus said. "I want to marry you at the pulpit in front of the senate house. There shall be a huge reception, and lots of food, and music-"

"And Brutus will be the one to wear the dress," Cassius finished.

"Me? _You_ are the pretty one."

"In what world do you live?" Cassius laughed. "You will be dressed in white, and we'll have your hair done."

"I'm not a _girl_," Brutus complained, pouting. Cassius grinned. He just loved to tease his fiance.

Cassius suddenly turned serious. "Brutus, if it is okay with you, Titinius would you be my best man?"

Titinius looked touch. "It would be my honor," he said. For a moment Titinius looked like he wanted to kiss him, and Cassius found that he wouldn't mind that at all. Then he remembered that Titinius wouldn't do it in front of his lover, and disappointment hit him. Instead, Cassius reached down and took one of his hands in his own. Brutus did notice, but he didn't say anything. As awkward as it was, Cassius enjoyed the feeling of Titinius' thumb stroking his fingers. Cassius smiled, and Titinius smiled back.

Brutus cleared his throat. "I think this is far enough," he decided. "Cassius needs to rest."

"I am fine," Cassius reassured his lover. Brutus could be a bit overprotective of Cassius at times, like when they were walking Brutus would send glares in Titinius' direction, only stopping when Cassius caught him. Still, Cassius knew Brutus was doing it because he loved him, and Cassius couldn't help but love him back for it. It was actually kind of adorable.

"Cassius, a word if I may," said Brutus then. Cassius followed Brutus away from Titinius and Pindarus, nervous to face an angry Brutus. "What is going on with you and Titinius?"

"I-" Cassius stammered.

"He kissed you-which is fine, once, but you keep looking at him and he keeps looking at you," Brutus said. Cassius could tell he was trying not to cry. "Cassius, I...I am devoted to you. You have made me fall for you. Was it only a game, all along did you plan to run back to Titinius?"

"No!" Cassius grabbed Brutus' hand. "You are the love of my life. If I didn't love you than I couldn't love anyone. Give me a way that I can prove it to you, and I will do it."

Brutus' dark eyes gazed into his, so filled with love, and Cassius couldn't help falling harder. "Kiss me," Brutus said, and Cassius immediately pressed his lips against Brutus'. He backed Brutus against a tree, deepening the kiss, and when Brutus moaned into his mouth Cassius immediately pushed his tongue past Brutus teeth. He sucked on his lover's tongue hungrily, getting lost in the deliciousness of Brutus' mouth. Brutus' arms went around his neck and Cassius swept Brutus into his arms, still kissing him.

Brutus squealed and laughed as Cassius picked him up. "Let me go!" he gasped, still breathless from their kiss.

"Oh, Brutus," Cassius sighed, kissing him softly. "I'll never let you go."

* * *

When Brutus and Cassius returned to the other two-well, there were more than two. Messala, Strato, Lucillius, and Brutus' servant, Lucius. "My lords," Messala said, his eyes full of excitement. "We've won the first battle."


	5. Chapter 5

The first thing Cassius did was kiss Brutus. His first instinct had literally been to kiss Brutus breathless. And when Messala and Strato pretended to throw up, Cassius licked Brutus' tongue, making sure it was obvious to their friends.

"Do you have to do that here?" Messala complained.

"Yes," Cassius said as Brutus smiled up at him. "Yes we do." Filled with pure happiness, Cassius grabbed Titinius and embraced him tightly. His best friend looked slightly dazed when Cassius finally set him down, but he looked happy also.

"Come back to the tents with us," Strato suggested. "We will celebrate our victory before the next battle tomorrow."

They did return to the tents; however, Cassius and Brutus did not join their friends to celebrate. Instead, Cassius followed Brutus inside his tent where he was thrown down onto the bed. Brutus quickly undressed Cassius and then himself before climbing on top of Cassius and smashing their lips together. Cassius moaned loudly as Brutus grinded his hips against Cassius', once, twice, thrice. "Brutus!" Cassius gasped. "Oh, Brutus!"

Brutus kissed his throat softly. "Shh," he whispered.

"Everyone knows about us," Cassius pointed out, then yelled in alarm when Brutus pushed a finger inside him. He pushed deeper, and Cassius closed his eyes and leaned his head back in complete bliss. "Brutus, please...more..." he said weakly.

"You shall have more," Brutus said.

"Now," Cassius pleaded, wanting more than anything to have Brutus inside him.

"Brother-"

"Now!" So Brutus slid into him and Cassius screamed, but Brutus kissed his lips to muffle his screams. "Brutus! Oh gods, Brutus!"

He felt Brutus smile against his mouth. "I love hearing you scream my name like that."

"Brutus-" Cassius started, but Brutus silenced him with a kiss.

"I do like kissing you more though," Brutus informed him. Cassius smiled and captured his lips again, savoring the sweet taste of them. Brutus was a good kisser, better even than Titinius. The kiss he had shared with his best friend had been good, but Titinius was a bit inexperienced. However, Cassius knew Brutus had been with Caesar, and before him Cicero and before him Cinna.

"My pretty Brutus," Cassius sighed against his lover's mouth, wrapping his arms around Brutus' waist as he slid deeper. Brutus pulled out and Cassius knew he was going to be sore in the morning but he didn't care, didn't care, didn't care-

"I am not pretty," Brutus complained, but Cassius kissed him as a surge of love for his Brutus came over him.

"You are more beautiful than any woman I've been with," Cassius declared.

Brutus sighed. "And you are the romantic in this relationship." He smiled and kissed Cassius deeply.

"That I am," Cassius agreed. "But when you declared your love for Caesar you did kneel before him and present him with a red rose."

"How original of me." Brutus kissed Cassius harder this time.

"He thought it was sweet." Cassius pulled Brutus closer, putting his hand on the back of Brutus' neck. "He said so in your absence."

Brutus blushed, and then frowned. "He loved me," Brutus said sadly.

"No, my Brutus, let us think of him no more," Cassius decided. "There is only you and me now. You and me."

"Let us go join the others," Brutus suggested. "I would like to see how they are celebrating. It is too quiet out there."

Cassius agreed, and they dressed each other and went outside. They were all sitting around a campfire in a circle and Messala was speaking. Cassius realized his friend was telling a ghost story. That made him nervous. As a boy he had never liked ghost stories, or scary stories of any kind, and he realized he still held that trait as an adult.

"It was a dark and stormy night like this one," Messala was saying.

"It is not stormy," Titinius observed.

Messala glowered at him, and Cassius sat down beside him and Brutus sat on Cassius' lap, wrapping his arms around his neck. Cassius smiled and held him close, resting his chin against his lover's soft hair, and he listened to Messala's story closely. It was a good thing that Brutus would be beside him tonight.

"A couple was walking through an orchard in Rome," Messala declared, "when they saw a grave in the yard. It was the grave of an old woman, who was born on March 20, 29 BC. But the most surprising part, was the day that she died was October 17, the very day that the couple was in the orchard. And then, slowly, the woman felt a terrible presence behind her. And then-" Messala stopped dramatically, and Cassius felt a pair of hands on his shoulders. He screamed and fell backwards, Brutus fell on top of him as everyone burst out laughing, and Cassius looked up to see Strato staring down at them.

"Very funny," Cassius pouted. "I'm sorry, love," he said to Brutus.

"I'm all right," Brutus assured him.

"You scream like a girl," Titinius said through his laughter.

"You really do," Brutus agreed, an amused expression on his face. Cassius blushed. "And he says I'm the girl in the relationship."

Everyone laughed. "You be quiet," said Cassius, and when Brutus began to protest he kissed him. Someone whistled as the kiss deepened and Cassius closed his eyes. "I love you," he whispered against Brutus' lips, and Brutus shivered.

"I think we have seen enough, noble generals," Messala said. Cassius pulled back and noticed Brutus' face was flushed even in the darkness.

"I love you as well," Brutus whispered back.


	6. Chapter 6

Later, when Cassius was lying beside Brutus, he said, "Do you think we could win?"

Brutus hesitated. "I think it possible," he finally decided, kissing Cassius' light brown curls. Cassius snuggled closer to him. "Either way, I will stay by your side tomorrow."

Cassius smiled and lifted his head off Brutus' chest to kiss him. They kissed deeply, just a brush of their lips before Cassius lay his head back down. He closed his eyes, completely savoring the feeling of his lover's fingers running through his hair. "I love you," Cassius mumbled happily. They could die tomorrow, both of them, yet Cassius couldn't remember ever feeling happier. Still, there was that feeling of dread, like Cassius wouldn't be able to protect Brutus. "You do know that I love you, right?" He looked up at Brutus from his chest.

Brutus smiled. "I know," he murmured, still stroking his lover's hair. "Kiss me already, would you?" Cassius smiled too and kissed him softly, closing his eyes and groaning in pleasure as Brutus' lips moved against his. Brutus' kisses never failed to amaze him.

"Cassius..." He felt Brutus' arms wrap around him, and Cassius whimpered.

"Gods, Brutus..." Cassius moaned. They kissed for a while before Cassius finally got bored and began to kiss Brutus' neck.

It all but drove Brutus insane. Brutus sprang on him, knocking him over, and he smashed their lips together. Just then, a child's voice interrupted them. "I have the wine you requested earlier, my lord," Lucius said. Brutus sprang back and flushed, embarrassed. Cassius smiled. "We'd run out so I had to get more. I apologize if I took so long, my lord."

Brutus got up and filled a glass. "Tis not your fault that I drink so much wine, Lucius." He smiled and took a sip, then offered some to Cassius.

"I'll leave you," Lucius suggested. "I think I interrupted something." He smiled and left, leaving Brutus staring after him in wonder.

"He is a smart boy," Cassius observed, setting the cup of wine on Brutus' bedside table. "Let us continue where we left off, my Brutus."

Brutus smiled and threw himself onto Cassius, knocking him over again. Brutus was so good in bed, better than anyone Cassius had been with. Cassius kissed Brutus hard, so hard that his lips were sure to be bruised. He kissed Brutus' neck and jaw, then he slid down the bed to kiss lower. He kissed Brutus' torso and his stomach, then removed Brutus' tunic to reveal his erection. "Cassius," Brutus whimpered. "Please..."

Cassius looked up at Brutus, grinning mischievously. "Are you sure?"

"Don't you play games with me, Gaius Cassius Longinus," Brutus panted as Cassius stroked him. "Oh, Cassius," he moaned. "Cassius..."

Cassius smiled and licked him gently. "Cassius!" Brutus screamed, and Cassius jumped. "Sorry."

"I'm fine." Cassius took Brutus' erection in his mouth again, and Brutus moaned loudly. "Oh Cassius, you're so good, so so good..."

"Better than Caesar?" Cassius mumbled.

"Better than Caesar!" Brutus agreed. "I think...I think I'm going to..."

"Yes," Cassius urged. "Come for me, my Brutus."

Brutus came with Cassius' name on his lips, and Cassius swallowed and joined Brutus at the top of the bed. "I love you," Brutus breathed, kissing him softly on the lips.

"I love you," Cassius echoed, kissing back. "I really hope Lucius didn't hear that."

"I'm pretty sure the whole camp heard that." Brutus wrapped his arms around Cassius' neck, pulling him closer. "I love you..."

Cassius couldn't help smiling. "I love hearing you say it."

"I love you," Brutus repeated. "I love you, I love you, I love you, I-"

Cassius interrupted his lover with a kiss, a short one before he yawned and snuggled against Brutus. "'M tired," he mumbled.

"I can see that."

"I don't want to sleep."

"You need to sleep," said Brutus. "You need your energy for tomorrow, and I need mine."

"But-"

Brutus kissed him. "Sleep, love. I'll be right here if you need me."

"Goodnight," said Cassius. "I love you."

"I love you, Caius," he heard Brutus say before he fell asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

The next thing Cassius knew, it was light outside. Brutus wasn't in bed with him, Cassius realized. No, he was alone in tent. But why would Brutus leave him? He dressed himself and left the tent, only to run straight into said lover.

"Cassius," he growled. This couldn't be good.

"What?"

Brutus grabbed Cassius and pulled him into his tent. "Strato said he was passing by Titinius' tent and he heard Titinius moaning-your name, specifically."

"I have no idea what you're talking about!" Cassius said. "Really! I was in here with you the whole night, I swear!"

Brutus glowered at him.

A lump formed in Cassius' throat. "You caught me, Brutus. I snuck out of your tent, went into Titinius' tent, and we had sex without anyone else but Strato hearing us and I came back here without waking you at all."

"Don't joke about it, Cassius," Brutus growled.

"I haven't seen Titinius since Messala's ghost story last night," Cassius insisted. "Please believe me, my love. You are-gods, Brutus, I don't even know where to start. But I do not desire Titinius, not anymore. He was not there for me when I loved him. I just want you."

Brutus' eyes glistened. "Why do I love you?" he said, voice cracking. Cassius' own eyes filled with tears and he sniffled. He stepped forward and kissed Brutus, putting his hands on either side of Brutus' waist.

"Titinius must have been pleasuring himself," Cassius predicted, feeling a pang of guilt at this idea. He remembered Titinius' soft lips again, and his fingers immediately went to touch his lips.

"You think of him now," Brutus observed.

"The kiss," Cassius said.

"You liked it."

"He is my best friend," said Cassius. "Of course I liked it. But I love you."

Brutus smiled. "Let's go, then. And I will stay beside you."

Cassius reached for his hand, and he laced their fingers together. "I love you, my Cassius."

* * *

They set out after that. They were going to fight today, and for that Cassius was nervous. He and Brutus rode in front, then Titinius, Messala, and Strato behind them. While they were riding forth, Cassius and Brutus exchanged a glance. Cassius was uncomfortably aware of Titinius' presence, it was like the man's eyes were staring into the back of his head.

They rode in silence, Cassius stared straight ahead of him. He saw Antony, his sword catching the light. He raised it as they approached closer. "I will fight beside you," he said to Brutus. "Always, always will I stay beside you."

Brutus' answering smile left him breathless, and then Antony pointed his sword at them. Chaos erupted then, and Cassius kept his gaze on Brutus. One of Antony's men lunged for him then, and Cassius immediately stabbed him. He turned back to Brutus only to find him gone.

Brutus! Where was he?! Frantically, Cassius searched around for his lover. "Titinius!" he shouted. "Have you seen-" Suddenly a figure on the ground caught Cassius' eye, and his heart jumped into his throat at the sight. "Brutus!"

He was not dead, not close either, but panting and covered in sweat. "Cassius," he mumbled.

"Can you get up?" Cassius asked him.

Brutus' eyes fluttered open. "I...I don't think..."

That was all Cassius needed to hear. He helped Brutus up, and set him in front of him on his horse. They headed back to the tents, Titinius following them.

"There's no one here," Cassius noticed as he helped Brutus off his horse. "No one burning our tents."

"I think they are too busy fighting," Titinius suggested.

"Antony's men already outnumber us," Cassius said. "Help me, Titinius."

Titinius helped Cassius get Brutus on his bed, and Cassius pulled off most of his armor and stopped only when he was in his tunic. "It's a fever," Titinius informed him.

Tears streamed down Cassius' face. "I turn my back for _one second_-" he started.

"It is _not_ your fault." Titinius put a hand on his shoulder. "Some idiot tried to kill you. You are not to blame, Cassius."

Cassius managed a weak smile. "I'm going to get a cloth for his head."

"Cassius," Brutus moaned as he got up.

"I'm right here," Cassius assured him as he returned with a cool cloth. He put it on his lover's head.

"Mmm, Cassius..." Brutus gasped as Cassius lifted his head to give him water. "So good...Don't leave me..."

"Never," Cassius promised through his tears. "You'll be okay, I _won't_ let you die."

"He will live." Titinius wrapped a reassuring arm around Cassius' shoulders. There were the old feelings again, the love he once felt for his best friend. "Look at me, Cassius. Brutus is strong. He will be just fine."

Cassius sniffled and embraced Titinius, burying his face in that soft dark hair. When they broke apart Titinius smiled. "I know you have feelings for me."

"Don't act so smug."

"I am not acting."

Cassius snorted. "And what of my feelings? I cannot act on them. Brutus needs me."

"Brutus is sleeping," Titinius pointed out. Cassius' lover was indeed breathing evenly, his eyes closed. "I need you right now, Cassius. You're marrying Brutus, you have the rest of your life to spend with him." Titinius reached down and took Cassius' hand in his. "But here and now, I need you."

Cassius couldn't help glancing down at Titinius' lips, so soft and inviting. "Titinius," Cassius sighed. "I can't do this. I can't betray my Brutus."

"It is just a kiss," Titinius said. "We have kissed before."

"You were the one who kissed me," Cassius pointed out. "And I didn't know if I would see you again."

Titinius clutched Cassius' fingers and put his hand on his lap. Cassius gasped, Titinius was as hard as a rock. "Do you feel that?" said Titinius. "I crave for you. I desire you, Caius Cassius."

"No," Cassius finally decided, and held Brutus' hand in his. "I belong to Brutus."


	8. Chapter 8

"I will fight beside you," Cassius told him as they ventured closer to Antony's men. "Always, always will I stay beside you."

Brutus smiled, filled with love for his Cassius. Antony's sword pointed at them, and arrows flew at them. Brutus managed to kill two of Antony's men when a sudden drowsiness came over him. It was like one instant he was fine, and then the next...

"Brutus!" he heard Cassius yell.

"Cassius," he mumbled back.

"Can you get up?"

Brutus forced his eyes open, his head spinning. He felt hot, like he was burning. "I...I don't think..." His words caught in his throat.

Vaguely, Brutus remembered Cassius helping him onto his horse. His eyes were closed, and through all the pain and burning he couldn't help thinking how good it felt when Cassius touched him. He heard voices but it was like they were echoing, and it was dark and hot. The only thing he knew was that Cassius and someone else was there-Titinius, the name was familiar to him.

Cassius put him down on something soft and comfortable that Brutus couldn't help sighing happily. He felt something cool on his head and oh, it felt so good. He felt a hand on the back of his head, and he opened his eyes just as he felt something cold and wet on his lips. Water.

Gasping, Brutus opened his mouth and gulped water. "Cassius," he moaned. "So good..." After having water, there was one other thing Brutus desired. "Don't leave me..."

"Never." Cassius' voice was broken. His heart ached for Cassius, he wanted to kiss Cassius but he felt himself drifting into sleep.

* * *

It was evening when Brutus woke up, and he felt much better. The fire was gone, at least. He felt arms around him, and he rolled over in bed to find a sleeping Cassius. Brutus smiled, his lover looked younger when he was sleeping.

"I told him he would get your fever if he got too close," a voice said. Brutus jumped and turned around to see Titinius. He looked amused. "But he insisted. He hasn't left your side in the past two days." He shook his head. "That one's devoted to you."

Brutus smiled and pushed hair out of Cassius' eyes. His face was covered in sweat. Brutus pulled the sheet off Cassius thinking he must be hot, and Cassius rolled over. "Brutus," he whimpered, almost a mumble.

Brutus smiled. Cassius was moaning his name in his sleep. "I should go," Titinus said quickly, and left before Brutus could stop him.

"Cassius?" Brutus said softly, cupping the man's face in his hands. When Cassius didn't wake he brushed his lips against Cassius' in the softest of kisses.

Cassius' eyes opened. "Brutus!" he gasped, and to Brutus' surprise Cassius pulled him to his chest. "Oh, thank the gods you're okay..."

Brutus smiled. "How long was I out?

"Two days." Cassius kissed him. "I love you so much," he said, eyes already wet with tears.

"Don't cry." Brutus wiped Cassius' eyes and softly touched his lips to Brutus'. "Thank you so much for staying with me."

"You don't need to thank me, my Brutus," Cassius said against his mouth. "I told you, I will always stay by your side." Brutus smiled and had Cassius pinned to the bed the next instant. It shocked Cassius. "For someone who is getting over a fever, you sure do move fast."

"Too fast for you, perhaps. Now shut up and kiss me."

"You are the one talking," Cassius pointed out teasingly.

Brutus' jaw dropped. "If I were you I'd kiss me before I say something I might regret."

"Whatever." Cassius kissed Brutus hard so Brutus' lips were sure to be bruised. Brutus kissed his neck and Cassius threw his head back and moaned. Brutus immediately reached for Cassius' tunic and he put a hand in it. "Brutus!"

His lover smiled and kissed him on the lips. "Yes, Cassius. Beg for me."

Cassius moaned loudly, and Brutus stroked him. "Oh Cassius, you're so hard," Brutus sighed.

"I am hard for you." Cassius reached for his lover's hand and held it, kissing him softly. "Take me, noble Brutus, just like the other times. Please."

Brutus did, and Cassius came inside his lover screaming, "Marcus!" at the top of his lungs, so loud that he noticed Brutus wince. "Marcus," Cassius whimpered as Brutus pushed deeper. "Please...oh, gods...I love you so much, Marcus Brutus."

"And I love you, Caius Cassius," Brutus answered, kissing his lover deeply. The fire had stopped, and he was with Cassius, fine and healthy, and they were winning. They would wed in Rome and rule together, and everything would be fine in the end.

Brutus was sure of it.


	9. Chapter 9

The battle was over, and for that everyone was grateful. Messala had told the tale many times already about how he and Titinius had taken on Octavius and Antony, and how Messala had saved Titinius' life when he was almost beheaded by Mark Antony. Now Octavius and Antony were both dead, and they were all going home.

"It seems as though Titinius has moved on," Cassius observed as he and Brutus watched Titinius and Messala exchange a smile.

"I hope so." Brutus kissed him softly, pulling him closer as the kiss deepened. "You are mine."

Cassius looked up to see Titinius and Messala holding hands. "Yours," Cassius agreed. "I love you."

"I love you," echoed Brutus, and they shared another kiss.

* * *

Their friends threw Brutus and Cassius a huge party in the senate house the night before the wedding. It was a surprise-both Brutus and Cassius had planned on getting rest but they were both pleasantly surprised. Brutus had only gone to get some papers, and luckily Cassius had wanted to go with him.

Now, Brutus was sitting in Cassius' lap at a table piled with food. "Look at this, Cassius," he said as he put a grape in Cassius' mouth. "Do you think everyone will be sober by the time our wedding comes tomorrow?"

"I hope so." Cassius gasped suddenly. "Brutus, look."

Brutus turned to see Titinius and Messala kissing in a corner of the room. "Wow," said Brutus, shocked. "That was fast."

"Better fast than slow." They watched Titinius all but drag Messala out of the room, and tried to hide their laughter.

"Where do you think they're going?" asked Brutus.

"I'll try not to think about it too much," Cassius answered, and Brutus burst out laughing again. In another part of the room he saw Cassius' former lover, Casca, kissing another Roman-Brutus recognized him to be Cinna.

He noticed Cassius saw them too. "I'm sorry," Brutus said, reaching for his lover's hand.

"I'm long over that." Cassius kissed him softly.

"Did you just call Casca _that_?" Brutus laughed.

"No," Cassius said, "what we had. Or what I thought we had."

"What exactly happened with you and Casca?" Brutus wondered. "I thought you really liked him."

"I did," Cassius admitted. "But he'd been with Cinna before me, and he said he couldn't move on."

"I thought you were lovers for several weeks."

"Not lovers," said Cassius. "We never-"

They heard a scream from a room down the hall then, and Brutus smiled knowingly at Cassius. "I'm happy for Titinius," Cassius admitted. "Messala will be good to him, I know."

"How do you know?"

"Because if he isn't I'll hurt him."

Brutus smiled. "You still love Titinius, don't you?"

"What?" Cassius' voice went high, like it always did when he tried to lie. "No. I love _you_."

"I know." Brutus kissed him. "But you still hold love for Titinius."

Cassius was so in denial. "No, I don't."

"You do."

"Don't."

Brutus sighed. "So if he kissed you right now, would you stop him?"

"But-"

"No buts."

"That's disappointing."

It took a moment for Brutus to understand Cassius' joke, and then he laughed. "If I allowed it."

Cassius hesitated. "Just kiss me right now."

"Not until you admit you love Titinius."

"Fine, I love Titinius."

"Are you saying that just so I'll kiss you?"

"Damn it, Brutus!" Cassius put his hand on the back of Brutus' head and kissed him hard, and Brutus moaned and had no choice but to kiss back. He wrapped his arms around Cassius' waist, kissing him so hard that Cassius whimpered. "Brutus," he moaned. "Let's leave."

"Leave our own party?" Brutus repeated. It seemed like a good idea, but- "Don't you think people will notice our absence?"

"I doubt it." Cassius grabbed his hand, and Brutus followed him out of the senate house.


	10. Chapter 10

The next morning, Cassius woke with his head against Brutus' chest, and he sighed happily, not wanting to move at all. "Ow," he hissed when he did, still a bit sore from last night.

Brutus' eyes flew open. "Cassius," he said worriedly. "Are you hurt?"

"Sore is all, my Brutus." Cassius leaned down and kissed him lightly. To Cassius' surprise, Brutus' eyes were filled with tears when he pulled back. "Love? What's the matter?"

"I hurt you," Brutus choked.

Cassius smiled, wiping his lover's eyes. "No," he objected. "Last night was...gods, Brutus, you still amaze me."

Brutus tried to laugh. It came out as a weak chuckle. "I reallly shouldn't touch you, but..."

"Do it," Cassius insisted. "Please, Brutus...oh..." He felt Brutus' hand wrap around his erection. "Brutus!" He closed his eyes when Brutus kissed his neck.

"Yes, Cassius," Brutus moaned. "I love to hear you begging for me. Do it again."

"Brutus," Cassius whimpered, desperate to have Brutus inside him.

"Very good." Brutus kissed him on the lips. "Undress me now, Cassius." Cassius obeyed, removing Brutus' toga and climbing on top of him. Brutus was on top of him the next second. "You think to dominate me?"

Cassius went crimson. "I-I don't-" He was interrupted by Brutus' lips, and his tongue which entered his mouth soon after. "Brutus, please," he whimpered as Brutus kissed his jaw.

"Yes, my Cassius," Brutus mumbled.

"Please, I-I need you-" Cassius gasped as Brutus softly bit into his skin.

"Cassius, I am going to ask you a question." Brutus' dark brown eyes were so full of love that Cassius smiled blissfully.

"Okay."

"And I want you to answer me very clearly."

"Yes."

"Do you want me?"

Cassius' eyes bulged. "_Marcus Junius Brutus_!"

Brutus fell backwards onto the bed laughing, giving Cassius the opportunity to climb on top of him. Cassius kissed Brutus, silencing him, and without warning he pushed into Brutus. As Brutus screamed he thrusted deeper, and he collapsed on top of Brutus as they called out the other's name.

"Cassius," Brutus gasped, "that was..."

"Amazing," Cassius finished, and kissed him softly.

* * *

"Cassius."

Cassius sighed against Brutus' lips, trying to ignore his best friend's voice. He kissed Brutus harder, but Titinius was pulling on his sleeve and it was vexing him. "Cassius! I am not going to stand here and _watch_ you make out with Brutus!"

"Fine, what is it?" Titinius pulled him into the hall and Brutus went to talk to some of their friends. "I was busy."

"I noticed," said Titinius. "It's about Messala."

"Oh, that," Cassius understood. "Congratulations, I saw you and him at the party last night."

"That's just it," Titinius went on. "We didn't mean to. I mean, I didn't. I don't know about him, but-"

"Titinius," Cassius laughed. "Slow down."

His best friend sighed. "Messala and I were both drunk. When we kissed, when we...slept together. I'm so embarrassed. Should I say anything to him? What do I do? He's my friend, Cassius, he saved my life. He's not some guy I just slept with. And I...I think I might love him." Titinius blushed prettily.

Cassius smiled. "Good for you," he said. "I would go talk to him. You owe it to yourself to find out if he really meant it or if he was just as drunk and incoherent as you were."

"Cassius..." Titinius hesitated. "I still love you too."

"I know." Cassius swallowed the lump in his throat. "And I love you. I miss what we could have had."

"We still have it," Titinius said, and then he grinned. "Don't try to deny the fact that you'd enjoy it if I kissed you right now."

"I definitely wouldn't mind," Cassius admitted. _Those eye_s, he thought as Titinius' light blue eyes gazed into his. _And those lips. So soft_...He remembered the one kiss they ever shared, on that hill before Titinius left. _Messala is such a lucky guy. It must be hard _not_ to fall for Titinius_.

Cassius lifted trembling fingers and ran his thumb over Titinius' bottom lip. Titinius shivered. "I love you," Titinius murmured. "I really, really love you."

"I love you, Titinius." Cassius moved to kiss him.

"Awww," sighed a familiar voice. Cassius looked up in surprise to see his lover. "That is so sweet. You really _don't_ have feelings for Titinius, do you, Cassius?"

"Brutus!" Cassius flushed and stepped away from Titinius. "I-I was just-why are you _happy_?"

"Because I knew you still love him," Brutus said, and Titinius flushed as well, matching Cassius' shade of red.

"We were just-" Titinius started, but Brutus took his leave.

Cassius sighed. "Well, he caught me." He smiled. "He's not going to let me hear the end of this."

"How come?"

"From now on when I'm in denial, this will be his comeback." Titinius laughed and wrapped his arms around Cassius' neck.

"Cassius, we're about to start-" Messala stopped when he saw them, eyes full of betrayal.

"Messala!" Titinius called as Messala left. "Messala-" Titinius sighed. "Why do I keep messing up?"

"It's not you." Cassius stepped away. "Let's go. You go find Messala, and I'll go get ready."

"I love you," Titinius said as they parted, and Cassius smiled in answer.

* * *

"Cassius," said Strato as he helped a hyperventilating Cassius into his toga. "Everything will be okay. Brutus loves you."

"He loves me," Cassius repeated, grinning at his reflection.

"That's right." Strato patted him on the back and ushered him out of the room and up to the pulpit, where everyone was watching below them. He could see Titinius staring at Messala, who was faced the other way and glaring so obviously that hadn't been straightened out yet.** (AN: no pun intended) **

It seemed forever before Brutus finally came out of the senate house in a white toga and a matching hairpiece. He's so beautiful, Cassius thought, his heart beginning to speed up. Brutus' father was at his side, walking him towards Cassius. He placed Brutus' hand gently in Cassius', and Cassius smiled as he clutched it.

The vows began shortly after that, and then Messala brought them the rings. Cassius' hands trembled as he slid the ring onto Brutus' finger; he almost dropped the ring once which would not have been good. When he was given permission to kiss Brutus, Cassius grabbed his lover and pulled him into his arms, kissing him softly.

The kiss was amazing. Cassius loved to be able to kiss Brutus in front of everyone; their friends, their families. He moaned when Brutus' hands went in his hair and tilted his head to deepen the kiss. Cassius could smell Brutus, he could taste him, Brutus was all around him and he belonged to Cassius. It was the best feeling he had ever experienced.

When Cassius finally ended the kiss everyone clapped, and his eyes met Titinius', who was sitting in the front row. Cassius saw Messala staring at Titinius, and he grinned. He needed to do something about those idiots, but Brutus' arm was around his waist now and he couldn't concentrate. Later, then.

Definitely.


	11. Chapter 11

Titinius ran a hand through his hair as he looked around the party. Brutus and Cassius were kissing, that was new. He searched for Messala, finding him talking to Casca, Cinna, and Metellus Cimber. "Messala," he said when he approached them. "We need to talk."

Messala turned to their friends for help, but they all grinned and walked away, leaving Messala no choice but to follow Titinius into an empty room. "What?"

"I know you're embarrassed," Titinius said. "I get it. So am I. We were both drunk when it happened-"

Messala shook his head. "No, Titinius."

"No what?"

He sighed. "I wasn't drunk," he informed Titinius.

Titinius was stunned. "Wait...you weren't drunk? As in, were not?"

"That _is_ what 'weren't' means," Messala said.

"But-but I saw you drink it!" Titinius stammered. "I saw it go in your mouth and you swallowed it!"

"It was water," Messala admitted. "Titinius, I am so sorry I took advantage of you like that. It was horrible of me. You really need to stay away from me."

"No! Messala, don't you dare leave this room!" Titinius grabbed his arm. "You saved my life. Messala, I think..." He took a deep breath. "I think I'm in love with you."

Messala froze. "Titinius," he sighed. "I am so embarrassed that I did what I did. But I loved you, and I wanted to see if you felt the same. I never wanted things to go that far. I mean, of course I did," he added quickly when he saw the hurt look on Titinius' face, "I just didn't want it to be when you were drunk."

"Please, Messala." Titinius wrapped his arms around Messala's waist from behind him and rested his chin on the man's shoulder. "I promise I'm not drunk."

Messala burst out laughing, startling Titinius. "I don't know how that Cassius could have ever resisted you."

"He was the one who had a crush on me first," Titinius corrected him. "Then when I began to fall for him myself he had already moved on." He slid his hands lower.

"That's understandable," said Messala, turning around in Titinius' arms. "You're so pretty."

Titinius glared. "I am not-" he started, but Messala cut him off with his lips. Titinius closed his eyes and kissed back, but it felt weird, like something wasn't right. An image of Cassius popped up in his head, a whole series of them before Titinius even knew of Cassius' love for him.

Wait...what was he doing? He was here with a wonderful guy who didn't deserve him, because Titinius was daydreaming about his best friend while they were kissing! What was wrong with him? Titinius pulled back, his eyes filling with tears. It wasn't that Messala was bad at kissing, because he was really good. "I'm sorry," he told Messala. "I can't." He fled the room and ran outside where the wedding had taken place, and sat down on the steps. He wept all the tears that he had been holding in since the battle, since before when Cassius loved him and he wasn't there. _I deserve this_, Titinius thought as he buried his face in his arms. _I couldn't even see how much my best friend loved me_. He imagined that it was Cassius that was with him last night instead of Messala, dominating him, kissing him and making love to him.

_ Damn you, Caius Cassius_.

Titinius sat on the steps in front of the senate house for a long time, sobbing and thinking of Cassius. At one point he felt someone sit down beside him, and he looked up to see Messala. "Are you okay?" Messala put a hand on his shoulder. "I looked all over for you. What happened?"

Titinius wiped his eyes. Messala was being so sweet and here Titinius was, thinking of a person who couldn't love him. "Messala, I'm so sorry," he said, deciding to just come right out and say it. "When we kissed, I...oh gods, Messala, I was thinking of Cassius the whole time. I am a horrible person."

"I understand." Messala moved closer to him. "You're still in love with Cassius, and you are not a horrible person."

Titinius nodded, and Messala wrapped an arm around him. He rested his head on the man's shoulder and cried as Messala pulled him into an embrace. Messala was rubbing his back and Titinius was almost in his lap...But then he just found himself wishing he was Cassius, and he began sobbing all over again.

"Shh," Messala murmured. "I really hate to see you like this."

All Titinius could do was nod, his cheek against Messala's shoulder. "Titinius," he said then. "Look at me."

Titinius looked up, only to find Messala's lips pressed against his the next second. Titinius gasped and he wrapped his arms around Messala's neck, pulling the other man closer. Mine, he thought as he kissed Messala. He climbed into Messala's lap then, and Messala smiled against his lips as Titinius wrapped his legs around Messala's waist.

"Messala?"

"Yes?" Messala was gasping for breath, and so was Titinius.

"I love you."

Messala smiled, his eyes filled with love, and he pressed his lips against Titinius' in a heated kiss, wrapping his arms around Titinius' waist. It was kind of awkward because Titinius felt himself growing hard, and he knew Messala could feel it. He didn't seem to care, about that or the fact that anyone could come outside and see them making out on the steps. Not that Titinius cared, either. He loved Messala, and he knew that eventually he would be able to move on.


End file.
